The "Bad Mood" Thread

Vent of bad mood incoming. I just need that, feel free to ignore or whatever.

I think I'm going to need a mental therapy, possibly even some meds. I just can't find joy in my life as of late - everything seems dull, everything makes no sense. I also desperately need somebody to love me the way I am. But no matter how hard I try IRL -and mind you it's hard for me to break out and try finding someone, be it IRL or online- the furthest I was able to reach was a promise of a date, which never came to be. It's the main reason I feel bad, but there are many others. Just not big enough; apparently it's the sum of all them that makes me crumble inside.
The case is, I just know my family well enough to know they WILL try to neglect my feelings and problems (save for one person - my mother, but I'm not sure how she'd react too), they WILL say I'm faking them to get attention, that I don't have any real problems. Trust me. I'm just scared of what their reaction would be.
Besides of that, I don't feel like I'm able to feel any kind of emotions besides sadness and faked happiness anymore. I've been reading Calming Manatee (http://calmingmanatee.tumblr.com/), while doing this a tear or two might showed up. How fucked up am I?
... *sigh* This post at least made me feel tiniest bit better. This community feels like a second family, a place where I can rest my broken soul. But, it doesn't help at all in the long run, or at least I don't really feel so.

... Thanks if you have read this whole.

 

Absolutely do try and seek therapy and other forms of help, even if your family wouldn't support you in it. Try and find another person who will support you, and that can definitely be your therapist. From what I've seen of your posts, I think just having someone who will listen and support you would be a big positive step. I don't know what kind of medical/social programs are in your country, but I truly do hope you find what you need, the sooner the better. Every good and decent person (and you definitely are such) deserves to seek happiness and self acceptance.

 

@Z'haruul what if it isn't a yeast infection?

 

@Z'haruul so long as what the doc gave you you take all dosages it should be relieved soon.

 

In other news, I talked to my boyfriend today, as I asked him if we are ok. He told me he hasn't had the time to think about it, as he is mostly focused on surviving. I knew he'd been distant, just hadn't known how much. So I just reminded him that I wasn't going anywhere and that I was going to continue to support him the best I could, and that maybe improving our communication between each other would help. He says that there's a lot on his mind and he's confused and not sure about what he wants. And to not get offended. I'm not offended, just kinda disappointed and sad. Because I don't know what is on his mind, and I want to talk about it more. All I said then was that I just missed the little things, that I mattered to someone, and that even if we hadn't becme official that I would have waited anyway. I just want to go home and cry. I worry way too damned much, and should just focus on me for the next several days.

 

@SnowLycan I've made and appt with my gyno to be sure. All I ask is no horror stories okay? Please. I'm a hypochondriac as it is.

@Jazzi the Pegasus I'm taking them as I can. I can't take another pill until Sunday.

 

That's a good idea.

 

@Z'haruul as long as it isn't anything bad. But if it is something you might have to have words with your husband.

 

Well I have an appt today shortly after lunch. I would if my husband didn't still have his V card. He and I are the only partners we've had ever. I have never had any sort of sex and he has only had toys.

 

@Z'haruul might be something you used together that might not have agreed with you down there. It happens a lot with lubes and such.

 

Turns out I have a presistant yeast infection. My OBGYN said that if it's not better by Saturday e-mail her and she'll send me some more meds, but right now I'm to use some really awesome steroid cream.
So my bad mood is now gone. YAY!
Thanks everyone who helped me feel better. Many hugs to you.

 

@Z'haruul wahoo so hopefully you'll be as good as new soon then.

 

I hope so.

 

Dammit, I hate it when the roof of my mouth is sore *can't eat without pain*

 

Try using some Honey, that seems to help when I have a sore spot on the roof of my mouth, usually I get them after eating sour candy or pineapples.

 

I have none. Its all raw now x.x

 

http://www.pinterest.com/pin/257760778646553474/
Honey and jello mix. It's supposed to work wonders.

 

fraaaaaaack i ran outta white thread
i need probably another whole spool for this Screaming Death and i dont think my machine can handle heavy duty thread

 

I don't even fucking know anymore. I'm just going to copy and paste this entire thing.