The "Bad Mood" Thread

Just a little tip, repeat "Beep boop" to yourself until you shit yourself laughing. I heard it helps, but I haven't had a bout of depression since I heard it, so I have yet to try it.

 

Ouch >__< I'm hoping to avoid that. if I loose my car I'll essentially have to become a shut in, because we do not have a good public transit system where I live. I hope you still have ways to get around where you are that aren't just walking.

 

I'm mildly depressed. Or as I put it when it happens, I'm "cycling down." I call it that because it comes in cycles. Or epicycles, I guess, but I'm mathematically inclined: the big cycles aren't quite annual, and they don't happen on a schedule, so they're not SAD; the small cycles are fairly predictable with six-to-eight week lengths between the high and low points. The high points are manic, and I treasure them when they occur; the low points are, well, basically, this week.

I knew it was oncoming Monday morning, before the announcement of Robin Williams's death; the symptoms are familiar by now: multiple hits to the snooze alarm, a "fuck it all" attitude toward my morning meditation ritual, forgetting to do any physical upkeep beyond the bare minimum (I remember to brush my teeth, but working out, shaving or using moisturizer is just too damned much work—first world problems indeed), apathy toward my projects.

Certainly the depth of it is bad this week. I have all sorts of external excuses: I've hit an inflection point in a novella where now I have to knuckle down and marshal the 38,000 words I already have into, you know, an actual goddamned story; I've hit that point in my personal software project where, to get to the next adventure I'll have to do work and maybe write stuff I know I'll have to throw away; my professional workload is full of vaguaries and office politics, neither of which I know how to handle well.

Anyway, I'm not clinical. I have hope, and not that meta-hope some depressives get. I know how to manage it, step one being move the morning meditation to the evening so I don't have to think about it when I climb out of bed. Go to bed at 10pm, not 10:30pm. Checklists and timers. I'll climb out of this, like usual, and a few weeks from now I'll be back in fully high-functioning mode, writing a thousand words a day, finishing the do() operator in my compiler (really, it's a simple thing, I should just, er, do it), and producing lots of silliness.

But for now... sigh.

 

My dad has two cars, and I can use one while he's on his trip for work, as well as to get back and forth from scaring people at the amusement park later this year. The payments were $350 + insurance. As for public transit, that's basically non-existent in this town.

 

Oooo, a fellow Haunted house monster! Well met brother!

 

I get to do it at an amusement park.

 

I worked Six flags Cali Fright fest for 2 years. been there done it

 

This isn't so much a "bad mood" as a serious squick. This afternoon, after getting off the local light rail, I was climbing the steps up to the parking lot and I bumped into a woman. "Excuse me," I said. I had been reading a book and not paying attention.

"Excuse your fucking ass," she slurred back at me. I heard a rattling, like a marble in a can. As I raised my eyes I saw a large paper bag in her hand with gold tracery around the opening. Then I looked into her face. Random splatters of gold traced around her mouth and up her right cheek.

Jesus. I quickly climbed the stairs faster.

 

Wait, so she was drinking unicorn blood out of a bag...?

 

She either drinks Goldshlager sloppily or she was huffing paint. more than likely the latter.

 

No, she was huffing paint. You know how all those PSAs from your childhood warned you about not doing drugs, they'll destroy your brain cells? The propellant and colorant in gold paint might get you high, but it also really fucking will wreck your brain. It's one of the nastiest cheap "highs" out there, and the side effects (rapidly diminishing IQ, strokes, eventual death) are not something to wish on even your worst enemies.

 

I don't think Goldschlager bottles rattle like that. No, it was a paint can.

 

Cedar Fair's Kings Dominion, going on Year 4.

 

This

Sounds all most like bi-polar.. But sounds also like you have a better understanding of yourself more than most just be carefull

 

Argh Boris needs to vent. incoming wall o text-
Males can be so fucken arrogant ! (sorry guys but it's true)
~~~
So it seems im trapped in somewhat of a love triangle.
I've met two guys. Both friends. Both my friends. Both best friends of my friend and housemate.
Neither I had any intentions with, however one developed a blatantly obvious crush on me and the other. . Well.. not so obvious.
The first one, let's call him Jason* , liked me from the word go. But he doesn't really know a lot about me and hearing his history with women I just felt he was desperate.
The second guy, let's call him Luke*, was quiet and shy and we just chatted and really hit it off and could talk for hours.

Now through no intentions to spite anyone, I was growing fond of Luke, and he of me.
Jason now declares he likes me, due to me not being the type to pity date or say no, I let him down gently.
Welp. He doesnt take the rejection well. He stops talking to me and everything.
Come Monday night, I bring Luke with me to poker.
Jason was there. And despite us not being affectionate in the slightest, Jason was convinced Luke had moved in on 'his woman' and he wanted to punch him in the face. Jsut for showing up at poker.
That annoyed me.
Then I hear that he was carrying on to my housemate with this attitude 'if Luke the virgin never had a gf can get someone like Boris, then how hard can it be for me'?
Jason has SOME experience with women. he's also 26.
Luke is 20 and has only had two female encounters.

But this infuriated me cause its that exact fucken attitude why I DONT go for men like that. That think they're the better choice, entitled to something.
And furthermore I never 'picked' Luke, there was never a choice. I was not attracted to Jasons personality and I felt Lukes suited mine so much better. Experience aside.

But seriously, why can't men be fucken men and act like ADULTS ?!
Theres just so many other ways he could have dealt with this. And me and Luke have not even made anything official.
It just sucks that I have to tiptoe around this just to avoid hurting someone's widdle feelings.

Sorry to sound harsh but, he needs to learn how to handle rejection. And be realistic and accept that not everyone will be suitable.

So yeah. Idk what to do and im annoyed I've been dragged into the drama and dragged Luke in who never wanted any of this.

Uggghhhh.
MEN. STOP FEELING THE NEED TO PEE ALL OVER EVERYTHING.

/Endofrant.

 

@BorisLover -- "Jason" sounds like a real tool, and based on what you said he has said, I'd be careful around him. Two years ago that happened with my ex-gf/ex-roommate and he (Luddite) still stalks her and thinks her partner "stole" her (even though she never liked Luddite)... (Meanwhile I had liked Luddite and he led me one because he liked the feeling of me having a crush on him, but didn't have any intentions of dating me).

 

Oh geez don't say that ._.
I'm definitely being careful and waiting till it all blows over buuut it's so damn sucky.
But yeah he has a bit of a temper problem.

 

IIII Just mean be careful *squishes*

 

I shall do my best .... >.> .. :3

 

If it were me, well, things would be very different. But my view is quite different than most guys. I never expect people to like me, even if I like them. And if they don't, then well, it's someone I care about, so I want them to be happy.