What Is On Your Mind?

you don't need to explain yourself to anyone and honestly, that whole "don't give them a reaction" thing isn't as foolproof as people like to say it is. Everyone has different styles to their aggression. Standard bullies will give up if you hold out long enough, but real jerks will keep on until they you get you to crack no matter how long it takes, however the worst people are the ones who don't care about how you respond because they're in it for their own reasons, they won't be finished until they're satisfied, and you have no way of knowing what that entails. Best thing to do in any of these cases is to immediately distance yourself from them if possible. They can't fight with you if you're not there

 

What happened to my week off? Oh, right. I spent it sleeping in until mid afternoon pretending the outside world doesn't exist... stupid shitty mood swings.

 

hmm well at least you're well rested???

 

ugh, the back of my throat has had this itchy throbbing sensation for 48 hours now.
At first it felt just kinda tingly and tight (yknow like when you've been sucking dee for longer than an hour ;p), but now its kinda irritating. If it doesn't clear up in 3 more days I might need to do something about it

 

Hit 3000 followers on Tumblr! Made progress on XL Chance today and picked up 40 followers to commemorate it! That's just a few days after my blog turned 1

 

Congrats!

 

Mine turned 1 a few months ago and I still haven't done anything with it besides change the theme.

 

Which is why I am taking a break from that particular group. Mind you all, this is a gaming group that have let me join them and it is exciting as I hardly have folks to play games with on the PS3.

 

Getting real tired of someone using the fact that life stacked the cards against me as a reason to be nasty AND rub in the fact that I can't easily leave them. Sounds like an abusive spouse relationship huh? Shame this is my own mother I'm talking about.

 

I know that feeling.

 

I'm also getting real tired of feeling the need to vent about it online. I don't LIKE complaining. Especially since when I criticize her actions towards me, she uses things like "You sound like a victim" and "Poor [NAME], nobody understands you...". If I have to complain I want it to be about whatever normal folks complain about. My hair or something that I can shrug off.

I want to move forward in life.

 

We're on the same boat then. Row, row, row your boat...

Seriously now, I feel you there (and I think you know why). It's kind of... sad that parents seemingly never give proper support, and just talk or do shit instead of motivating and supporting their children, as they're supposed to do.

 

The problem is, that a lot of parents DO support and motivate their children, even once they're adults. Because that's natural. This? This isn't natural. Parents aren't supposed to do this, if this was a thousand years or two ago they'd be endangering the tribe's future. But because it's today and there's plenty of people doing stuff in the world, it's no big deal if a few dozen or hundred future workers and creators are torn apart, right?

You try to get help and tell people your parents are doing this. There's a better chance if you're still really young, young enough to decide the distress is real and not overreacting or trying to get your way over mommy and daddy. If you're a teen, you're screwed because "you're just in that rebellious/emo age". If you're an adult, you're expected to be out on your own already, and it's assumed that if you still live with them, you're lazy or worthless and you deserve what you get if you can't/won't leave them.

Abuse happens not when people decide to be abusive, but when others cannot or will not help, especially if they don't believe there's any abuse going on. If it's a case of no one can, it's a sad reality, but if it's no one will or no one believes it, then it's a sad state of humanity.

 

@Rassandra Gendal
sounds like a case of Toxic family members .. I have an article somewhere I'd be happy to link to you if you'd like ?
-edit- here it is.
http://www.marcandangel.com/2015/05/03/10-things-to-remember-about-toxic-family-members/?c=CYTFB

It gives some supportive advice and tips on how to best manage your own mental state as these sorts of relationships are a lot more involved than a friend or partner.

 

My friends linked me to something like this a while back especially when they found out how my family basically caused part of my mental breakdown of all things.

 

It's just a shame that the ones supposed to support us usually do the completely opposite thing.

 

I wish. Ended up getting all of 3 hours sleep last night. And then I managed to crash my car today, so all in all I wanna crawl into some deep dark hole and pretend today didn't happen.

 

What happened to your car??? Are you okay??? D:

 

I'll be honest here. I'm not the most mentally sound person. On a normal day, I'm fairly stable and I keep my mind in check. But when she does this, I find myself taking a walk for an hour or two because she actually manages to drive me to thinking about doing something REALLY stupid. And no, I don't mean suicide. And you know I won't tell her that because then she'll either see it as winning and push harder, or use that as an excuse to get me taken to some place I don't want to be by whining about how she "doesn't feel safe around me". Guess how safe I feel around her.

I just need to get out of this house before I throw my life away. Screw the odds because I'm gonna make my life better.