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Battle of the Sexes: real or imaginary

Discussion in 'Debates' started by Misskin, Dec 5, 2014.

  1. Wolfcat

    Wolfcat Well-Known Member

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    This is a off topic, but I wanted to respond here.

    I've met some wonderful people online. Some I even want to meet, as friends, and hang out / do things IRL (perhaps things would progress past friends, but I'd never assume it would.) They've made that much of an impression.
    That said, you absolutely need real life interaction. You need real friends and relationships. While I consider a few internet friends to be "true friends," we don't / can't / are too scared / etc. to meet (that will hopefully change.)

    Agree with all of this. I even have that fun experience of being awkward IRL because of my lack of social contact. Trust me, it sucks.

    I've spent *years* denying that I needed people, needed relationships, for some reason (There's a few reasons, but the short of it: It's much harder to be my "true self," in person. It's uncomfortable, and it takes courage.)

    Trust me: Do not try to go without real contact indefinitely. It's horrible. If you have real life social contact, and internet friends, that's great, but the latter can't replace the former.
     
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  2. Vitani

    Vitani Tertiary antagonist

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    Wolfcat, you bring up an excellent point.

    My post was not, in any way, saying that internet friends are not real friends, or not important. They certainly are. I have a bunch of online friends that mean the world to me.

    But like anything else, you need a balance, and one cannot replace the other.
     
  3. Wolfcat

    Wolfcat Well-Known Member

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    Oh, we can probably do without internet friends. How did past generations survive without them :p. Real life friendship, bonds, and relationships are not optional if you want to remain mentally healthy.

    That said, now that I've made these friends, I'm keeping 'em! They mean worlds to me.

    To not completely derail the thread: There's a war, but it tends to dissolve on an individual level (small groups) when people treat each other like humans (instead of treating people "like a woman, or man, etc.") If you can keep a lot of good people around, the "war" doesn't actually affect you very much.
     
  4. scalie

    scalie back pokin' snake

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    just gonna drop these real world example of 'activism' here...

    notice the condescending holier than thou lecturing tones and the complete rejection of any potential counter evidence. yeah, I'd say there are assholes on both sides, but one side is much more accepted and encouraged.
     
    Last edited: Jan 30, 2015
  5. RedVixenFur

    RedVixenFur Spaintard

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    Those are examples of why I would love to see some people get executed in public. Feminism=brony fandom, love and tolerate us and we will hate and insult you.
    Yep. Add the Scum Manifesto and you have the best non-sense-violence cocktail ever.
     
  6. gerbilfluff

    gerbilfluff .

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    See, but have you seen many folks' reactions IRL when the Scum Manifesto is brought up? I bet you money you'd see some massive eye-rolling even from any feminists there.

    There's extremists in any faction. Saying that every feminist is preaching the Scum Manifesto is like saying every Christian is on the side of the KKK. The extremists are often *loudest,* and that goes for any side. Doesn't mean folks are actually backing them up.
     
  7. RedVixenFur

    RedVixenFur Spaintard

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    The problem comes when you demand respect and call people fuck face, or pig and that person just wants to understand why his friends suicided. And comments like "You entitled shit, you deserve your penis cut to pieces".
    It's just idiotic, and you see that everywhere.
     
  8. gerbilfluff

    gerbilfluff .

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    [shrug] Got my vote there. Nothing deserves that kind of debate-silencing fuckwittery, I don't care which side of a debate anyone's on. That's not debate; that's trolling.

    Something to be said for empathy for other people's situations in these sort of debates. Just 'cause it sucks for you doesn't mean it can't also be sucking for somebody else. Something called "intersectionality" in third-wave feminism gives that sort of stuff-can-be-sucking-for-people-in-more-than-one-way the time I think it deserves-- across lines of race, class, gender, sexual orientation, all kinds of things.

    Though it's especially sad when the only cases folks've come up against ARE the ones who spit the most extremist, inflammatory words. I really do believe most folks' viewpoints fall somewhere in the middle, yet if all people think a side is is shouting and extremism, of *course* the other side's gonna seem cozier.
     
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  9. MurphyAlter

    MurphyAlter The Floofiest

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    I think this is a notion everyone can agree on, and is why the less-extreme parts of ANY community need to voice themselves even louder, to say "Hey, I'm not with stupid!"
     
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  10. scalie

    scalie back pokin' snake

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    in my experiences that only makes the extreme cases even more extreme
     
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  11. MurphyAlter

    MurphyAlter The Floofiest

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    Even then, it would help avoid causes being hijacked, which I think would help everyone understand that they have more in common than they think.
     
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  12. scalie

    scalie back pokin' snake

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    GuyStripes likes this.
  13. GuyStripes

    GuyStripes An automatonic shark pirate

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  14. Abylgan

    Abylgan Enigma

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    Huh, that's kind of interesting. I had always read that the UK was horrible in terms of prosecuting rapists. As in, most women who got raped over there wouldn't bother reporting it because so few rapists actually got punished. I also read about one case where a ten year old got raped by a 21 year old, and he got off free because he said she dressed provocatively. So... not real sure what to think about the new law.
     
  15. GuyStripes

    GuyStripes An automatonic shark pirate

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    Rape is one of those crimes that's very hard to deal with, it's very devistating to the people who are actually raped, and it's also very devistating to the ones who accused of the act but are totally innocent.

    I think that law change is a step in the wrong direction. Its like now people need consent forms signed and a video or audio confirmation, just to fucking fuck, in order to make sure they're protected from being accused of rape.

    And why do only men have to do this? A women can force herself onto a guy, rape him, but it's up to the man to prove that it wasn't consentual? This is the kind of ass backwards thinking that's ruining everything for everyone.

    If laws like this go into effect here in the states, then I'm completely done. Despite some of my posts in the adult section of these forums, I'm so hesitant to engage in ANY kind of interaction with others because of things like this.
     
  16. GuyStripes

    GuyStripes An automatonic shark pirate

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    Not going to visitng the UK anytime soon.

    With all of this rape hysteria and ever changing rules and definitions of consent, I'm just going to start carrying these around.
     

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  17. RedVixenFur

    RedVixenFur Spaintard

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    I'm not wasting my money in printing those. I prefer to stay home, safe and warm with hot chocolate.
     
  18. RedVixenFur

    RedVixenFur Spaintard

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    Quoting a Facebook acquaintance. A man, who is all for equality. Yeah... equality.
    "Ojalá algún día persigan activamente a la gente blanca, heterosexual y hombre y les maten y les invaliden y les prohiban ser ellos mismos en público a ver si luego hace tanta gracia los chistes sobre eso

    Escoria humana es lo que sois.
    P u t a escoria"
    Translation:
    "Hopefully someday they will actively pursue white, heterosexual and man people (yup, bad writing) and kill them and invalidate them and prohibit to be themselves in public so we can see if they laugh at the jokes.
    Human scum is what you are.

    F u c k i n g scum"

    Welp, if you ask me this is pretty moronic. Trying to stop violence by promoting violence. GG WP.
     
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  19. Exeter

    Exeter Cuddly, Snuggly, Slutty Dragon

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    Okay I've been thinking about this for days and it's been bothering me, a lot. The issue I have is that this card assumes that someone consenting at 5:45 in the afternoon before the encounter begins has remained consenting until the end. You can't sign away your right to retract consent. If you agree to have sex and the encounter takes a nasty turn and you're suddenly trapped and unable to escape and being raped, AND even considering you might have felt comfortable trusting them beforehand, they're not absolved of the crime because you agreed to sex in advance. You didn't agree to have your consent or lack thereof overruled.

    You CANNOT sign away your rights. This kind of blind, unthinking shorthand for skipping the responsibility to treat a sexual partner with dignity and respect their wishes reeks of the immature people who can't accept that rape is an important topic for people, especially victims. Give that card to your lawyer and they will laugh you out of their office. Pocket cards, even legally-binding contracts, do not supercede the law.
     
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  20. MurphyAlter

    MurphyAlter The Floofiest

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    Yanno, I was thinking how I thought the card felt like a bad solution, but couldn't put my finger on it. Thanks for putting it so eloquently~
     
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