Long Distance Relationships!

i dont have much of a choice... he is going to be gone for who knows how long and i am terrified if he never comes home.

im probably not going to find another person. because i really do feel as if he was my other...

 

Aww I'm sorry Ice. I know it seems like the generic thing when you need comfort, but there's plenty of fish in the sea! You seem like a lovely person to me, so you never know what's out there! Things surprise you when you least expect it. So keep your head up, hun! ♥

 

Makes me wonder if he was deployed like my bf 0.0

 

he was just about to go into his A School.

i cant let him go... i just cant. i promised him i wouldnt. i love him far too much to leave. im not going through with this again.

 

I'm sorry, Ice. Long distance relationships are super hard. Sometimes it sucks when both people can't work together on something. :c I'm really, really sorry. I wish I could help more.

 

thanks Grimm. pretty much any talking helps.

his grandmother agrees that i should just let go. i dont really want to, ive had to let go of people that i love enough that its getting hard to let new people get close to me to such a level because i fear that i will have to let them go eventually. even, when i got with him, i was hesitant because i promised myself no more long distance. but i guess my hopes of "itll be different this time" and "he's been my best friend longer than about anyone else" got better of it. we were two weeks from meeting, which would be the first time ive really had a boyfriend physically with me.

i just hope this is over soon, his being shipped out on some project... because i havent fully let go. i dont think i can. he is pretty well the first i was truly serious with- and that can be told as in, i dont like (small) children, but i would with him when the time is right.

*sigh* well, ive got a handful and a half of condoms for a good, long time, should they ever be needed. probably not, Icy's still a virgin. though thats probably a good thing in today's world, for an 18 year old. *shrug* most of them are good up to 2019. best be prepared, right?

 

I'm in the same boat with Vitani, long distance relationships just don't work out for me :<

I've had several in the past and I'll be 100% honest, they actually helped me to get where I am today. For the longest time I felt unwanted/unloved (middle school and high school will do that to ya when you're "unpopular"), but having those long distance relationships proved to be beneficial. They helped solidify what my mom always told me during that time frame.

"This is just a small point in your life, you have your whole life ahead of you and there are so many more people that you're going to meet. This is not the end-all be-all."

And I've taken her words to heart, and it's landed me in the longest lasting relationship I've ever had

But in the long run, it either works for you, or it doesn't. Just remember that there will ALWAYS be someone out there who loves you and cares for you in any and every way, shape, and form.

 

Hey, I know it may sound dumb because it's so cliche, but don't ever be afraid of being alone or having to let go of people! Heck, sometimes things just don't work out. Does not mean you're any less of a person for having to do so. Being single gives you freedoms you don't always get to have when you're in a relationship, and sometimes you miss those things that being in a relationship has to offer you. There's always 2 sides to every coin, and sometimes one side is more of a bummer than the other. The only thing you should focus on? What makes you happy! Make yourself feel good as a person, and do things that make YOU happy!

I really like your advise, Vel! It's true; just because something ended badly or didn't end badly but just ended in a way that makes you sad, there is always someone out there who loves you! It's good to see that you've had success with long distance relationships. I know they sound scary to some and kinda stupid, but given the right people and circumstances, you can have some of the best experiences in your life! It may get hard sometimes, but you just gotta power through it and believe in yourself and the relationship!

 

Today my bf made me happy. I felt like he wasn't as stressed. And I felt appreciated a bit.

 

I must admit I don't really trust long distance relationships. Because it's all text and Skype chats sometimes webcaming (only if the person is legit). Other than those sessions how much do you really truly know about the person. He/she could be dating you on the side. You could be a string of multiply partners. You could be just there until they find success in life and drop you in an instance saying it doesn't work out because they have found someone in the Real world they can actually be with. Heck they could be lying about everything they tell you.

To me it's all text and weak promises. Saying "I love you" on a screen is as easy as breathing there's no real meaning behind it.
This may sound horrible but it's true. You could say anything romantic or loving via texts but there is no signs of emotion like the physical. When you look at your partner in the eyes and say say those words and there is not falter no random looking away etc just directly into your eyes that's when those words mean something.

 

I beg to differ on the subject.

I met my boyfriend in person. After that we only had texting, Skype and phone calls. Yes he's on tour for the military and we don't get to communicate often but there is emotion there. We see in each other an aspect of ourselves, a connection. Distance and stress for him and me have slightly dampered some aspects of the way we talk now, but I know that things will work out in the end. I have faith.

 

It's different chatting via texts and Skype when you have original been with the person and they are just travelling or away at the moment. I am talking about relationships starting online.

 

Oh for sure. I find that if I talk online for a short amount of time, it can be easy to forget about them. Ive done that a lot when I was trying out the online dating. Plus when I did meet a few of them in real life, they didn't appear as they did in their pictures, so that was a deal breaker in a way.

 

Even if the relationship starts out online, then it still doesn't have to be "chatting only". Grimm and I's relationship started out online and look where we are now. Almost 5 years down the line. I mean yeah sure, in the beginning it could feel a little shallow, if you can say that, because what if the person didn't turn out to be the one the person had told you he/she was, but then when we really got serious about meeting each other, I really felt something inside and it was only confirmed when I stepped into the airport building and saw her pretty face. I still remember it like yesterday. That's just my opinion on it though.

 

I find all relationships strange to be honest.

 

All relationships are strange, yeah. :B

But you can't really judge an offline one or an online one until you've tried either. And from my personal experience, unless you've fallen in love with a robot or a complete downright creep, I think it's pretty easy to figure out people. That and I've never had a problem with online relationships being anything but just texting and chatting. :'D

Most of my online relationships have been super fun, and I've met some fun guys that I've been able to play video games with. I've also done things like draw with them (back when I actually gave two cents about art and took pictures of my art than scanning them in XD). I've never gotten to meet up with any of my previous boyfriends who I've dated online, but it was a lot of fun. I have also found that many online friends I've made are just as special to me as any boyfriends I've had online! And figuring out a guy/gal online isn't any harder than making friends online if you try. :3

 

But playing games online with male friends and chatting to them etc is just the norm for me online. I never see them as relationships because I'd never be able to meet up with them and vice versa. I think what I class as relationships is the physical intimacy that you have in RL which you can't do online.

 

Oh i plan on getting physical all right.....

Well, come May/June -.-"

 

That song will be stuck in my head all day long now.

 

Sounds reasonable but like what I did with Grimmyr, get close to the person. It only paid off for me.