Depression and Anxiety Support Thread

I feel there is a bit of stigma aimed towards people who have to take medication to obtain balance and thats flat out wrong.
Sometimes our bodies just don't give us everything we need when we need it and there should be no shame in artificially supplying what we lack.

 

Half of my problem and with anxiety it was a function stopper. Medication helped out a lot as did therapy. Now I'm getting pushed toward diet and exercise but bad habits die hard. Diet part's getting easier but damn that exercise.

As for relevant things I love Boggle the owl, such a nice message for depression and other things.

 

When I find myself feeling depressed or struggling with it, its because of what I'm feeling/seeing around me. Being a sensitive human being who feels a lot of things around me, I can sometimes take on other people's feelings as my own. I can feel angry when I may not have a reason to for example. It's strange but I am like that. I can be overwhelmed easily sometimes. I can easily get myself upset. Sometimes simple change such as the school year ending and beginning again can really stress me out. Getting back into the swing of things can kick my ass and the year ending is usually busy and the hardest part due to finals and the stress it builds. However, I'm sure I'm not the only one who suffers that or all of these things alone. What brings me to depression is being aware of all the bad, negative things about this world. All the corruption, the struggle, the hardship. I realize that we as human beings make things so hard for ourselves. I see so many people around me who have to work so hard to simply make a living. People spend so much time and effort in college and getting a good-paying job but they spend little to no time on their dream. People like this usually have a mid-life crisis. I fear of having such a life as well as a mid-life crisis.

I have most of my shit together and I know what I want to do with my life but I'm just now sure how I'll get there. I want to be a creator. I want to write stories and create art and inspire people around the world with it. However, unless one is famous in this subject, artists don't make a lot of money. Most artists have to take a job in their art and do what they want to do on the side, or in some cases, get a completely different job. Seeing all of this and being aware of it makes me feel scared. It all seems so complicated and hard. I fear of suffering the same fate. It's been on my mind for so long and I honestly don't know how to put it to rest. It may always be there in the back of my head because we all doubt ourselves. We're never free of doubt and pain and suffering. Not everything is flowers and rainbows. However, I'd like to put it behind me so all it can do is tap on my shoulder rather than scream in my face. It's driven me mad to the point where I feel like giving up.

There's so much I want; a girlfriend, friends to call and hang out with, move out and live somewhere else. I've met so many wonderful people online who I wish to keep around forever and even visit. I've gotten to do a lot of wonderful things in my lifetime that not everyone got to do such as travel the world in high school, have an immense amount of talent in writing and drawing (I got into drawing a month and a half ago) and meet wonderful people far and wide. I have all of this and I'm only 20. I have dozens of people who have so much faith in me, who say I will go far but I don't give myself enough credit. I'm just pouring my heart out here so forgive me for the WALL-O-TEXT. I just want to believe that it is worth it, that there is beauty and magic in this world. That I will live the life I dream of. Then again, don't all of us wish that?

 

I feel ya, Xane. I'm somewhat the same, although I feel like I'm having something like a quarter-life crisis and I'm nowhere near as optimistic.

 

I have always struggles with mild, low grade depression. Got some help recently, but life has been tough of late. I'm jobless and currently chewing through my savings as I apply for grad school. I'm in that period when everything I try just falls flat. Every resume I send out and every interview I get ends the same way, "We'll be in touch." Then nothing...silence...even when I contact them back. It seems like I just cease to exist to them. My days are filled with the same routine and I feel trapped. I just...fuck it, I'm listless and have no clue what is coming next, alone if I can afford to follow my dreams and that is just starting to piss me off and put me in a bad place. I want to be in a career and doing what I love, not so unsure that I can't move forward. I've had so much change in the last 3 months, maybe I'm just expecting too much of myself and others, but fuck! This is hard shit.

I want to be happy. I want to be upbeat. I want to follow my dreams. I guess I just wanted to get some of that off my chest. Very few people would understand, let alone let me vent like that. Thanks all.

 

I wish I had more RL friends... past few weeks is nothing but no motivation to leave bed even with thing I really want to do that would motivate me, maybe I need a stronger dosage than what I have now? its hard to sleep most of the time. I sleep for 3-5 hours wake up fine, sleep more than that and I'm over tired. I feel that once my boyfriend comes here for 2 weeks and when we eventuly live together in the states I can feel better, feel more happy, but with everyone begging me not to move cause "why can't you just find someone in Canada or in town? why do you have to leave Canada? why can't he just move here?" ugh...I want to leave here behind cause I never ever want the chance to encounter anyone who bullied me ever again, its bad enough they still haunt my nightmares, to really move on with my life...but apparently its a bad thing...

 

noooope
you have every right to make a move and start over, don't feel the least bit guilty about it.
But a side note, you should try to find happiness in the presence, because living a life that hinges on "I will be happy when X happens" isn't very fufilling

 

Lately I've been getting depressed around this time each night. It's been going on for a while now, but I usually just end up going to bed instead of trying to deal with it. I wake up okay, and then the next day I'm down around 9/10pm again. I had thought that part of it was Kranix playing a lot of Destiny, but I realized it's happening even when he's paying attention to me, so now I don't even know what's causing it. And I haven't had a history of Seasonal Effective Disorder, so I don't think it's the dark... although maybe it is.
I don't know :\

 

oh I wouldn't be surprised if it was the dark. the sun is more important than we give it credit for and not having its mega rad rays for a certain amount of time, could totally cause effects in some people

 

Yeah :|
I do understand how important the sun is. I usually sleep with the blinds open so that I wake up in a better mood. And I've always hated the dark but I've never had this just, overwhelming bluh feeling every day before. So maybe it's just something that's getting worse or got worse from when I first had depression symptoms.
I dunno :?

 

I used to have this a lot. I figured out that my boredom and tiredness was pairing with my desire to stay up hoping something interesting will happen, and not wanting to miss it, all to somehow mix into nightly depression. My suggestion is to either go to bed earlier, or keep busy until you go to bed. Or you could take meds for ADHD, making boredom turn into motivation and energy like I did. XD

 

Yeah, usually around 9 or 10 is when I get sick of doing stuff, so then it might be boredom? At the same time though it feels like something else is triggering it, because suddenly I'll just become bored of whatever it is that I'm doing and stop? That's usually why I go to bed around 9:30/10pm most nights. That, and I need to get up at 7am.

 

Yeah, this is kind of your brain going "Maybe if I make the waking world feel like shit, she'll go to sleep!"

 

I do find it annoying when my depression gets brushed off as something that I'll get over by some of my work colleagues. Because they don't understand the condition. It's not just depression my medication stops its anxiety issues also.
When I ask how much some of my colleagues that are suffers are on when they mention they are on anti depressants they say like 10ml or even 30ml. Once I reply 150ml they're like holy crap and you come to work for all your shifts.

 

Suffer with both anybody feel free to contact me on here if they want even just for a chat


In the meantime I can think of a few lyrics that are allways helpful.

"falling is easy it's getting back up that becomes the problem,
If you believe you can get back up you've solved your problem" - Staind falling

Personally I love this lyic soo much it's allways one of them great bits as a sufferer of depression where I've self harmed and contemplated suicide after 8 years of on off councling for both anxiety and depression (I SERIOUSLY RECCOMEND TO PEOPLE DO COUNCILING / PHYCOLIGY IT HELPS IF ONE METHOD DOESN'T WORK KEEP THING DIFFERNT ONES (I kept getting referred to cbt (cognitive behavioural therapy) and it didn't work for me I needed to understand and be able to analyse my issues and I got one that was socially related and did that for me and the change from that one type of help i would say has helped change my life) ) I've noticed myself that I'm battling my depression if I have a shit day I work out why and analyse whether I need to be getting down or whether it's something that maybe most people would worry / stress about. I'm my latest point only a month or so ago where my 2 year relationship looked like it was ended I started telling myself NO! I WONT GO BACK TO BEING DEPRESSED. I tried and found positives that would of come of the situation but that mentality and drive of telling myself not to get depressed again seemed to help spur me on and keep me from spiraling down that old familiar slope of depression.

"it's how we survive that makes us who we are" - rise Against survive

 

I'm thinking the tension your reading through text could be a lot with you as well you need to talk face to face or even over phone just hearing someone's voice can help you assess the situation better I find if I think my partner is annoyed or upset I read the texts in a way there not ment to be read

 

I have a persistent depressive disorder, formerly called dysthymia, which basically means I have had a light depression for the past 15 years or so. And sometimes a major depressive episode on top of that. I have been taking meds for a year and a half now (I was always resisting them before, mostly because of fear of side effects), and they helped me. I did not have many side-effects: I sweat a bit more, I dream a bit more intensely, and orgasming is a bit harder (but I am still able to). It got even better when I quit my hormonal contraceptives (I had an implant), because that made my baseline mood even better and gave me my libido back (which was a bit... unhandy, with orgasming being more difficult, but whatever ).

But now I am burned out. I have no energy at all, and this has been the case for months, I think. I have had a lot on my plate the past year, and I have been pushing myself too much. My dad died almost a year ago, after being in the hospital for a month (but he did die at home, which was what he wanted), his wife (not my mom) just had a risky operation where they removed a tumor (but luckily it was not evil, or whatever you call that in English), my stepdad has had longue problems for as long as I've known him, but he is getting worse and worse (I do think he'll pass away in the next few years), one of my partners of 3 years broke up with me 6 months ago, I moved to a different city (which is a good thing, but still a big thing that caused stress), I changed jobs and I had a hard start at the new job (because I felt quite uncomfortable there, and in my role in the beginning), my girlfriend is a transwoman who is just starting her transition (which is no issue, but it does cost energy). This is all a LOT. I've been home from work since thursday. I'll go see a medical officer (if that's the correct term?) on friday, to see if we can come up with a plan.

I'm not sure why I post this here. I'd love some support, if anyone has the time/energy/care

 

I fear that I am regressing back into a very dark and depressive state.

I severely hope this is just a result of PMS and my fluctuating hormone levels but idk...
I just feel like it's a chore to be happy. Like it takes so much effort. I also feel incredibly alone, even when I'm around my boyfriend and/or my family. For some reason, I've been pulling away from all my friends, which doesn't make sense because I feel lonely? I just don't understand whats going on with me anymore.

I have no friends, but that's largely my own fault because I've been unresponsive (I find it too hard, or too stressful to answer texts or calls...even if it's just a friendly chat).
I desperately want friends, and I want to reconnect with the people who have been there for me so many times before, I just have this mental block there and not a clue how to get past that :/

 

Honestly, it sounds like you're just really burned out on life right now. Your symptoms will probably clear up eventually, but a nice vacation, even just going out of town for a weekend , would certainly help calm your stress a bit.

And since you do have a disorder that can cause minor depression, it would be a good idea to talk to your doctor and ask if the drug you are taking is one that tends to build a tolerance over time.

 

This list helped me a few times when I needed it:
http://iammissanna.tumblr.com/CalmingSites

The Soy Tu Aire link is pretty cool. You paint along with a song.